It is currently Mon Aug 20, 2018 4:41 am

HSC AffiliatesClick here for our affiliate link to Christianbook.comDonate to HSC





Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 7 posts ] 
Author Message
 Post subject: In this situation, what would you counsel a woman?
PostPosted: Mon Apr 30, 2018 11:05 am 
Offline

Joined: Sat Jun 30, 2012 5:22 pm
Posts: 8532
(You could think of her as your married daughter or maybe even ME asking you.) :)

She boasts to everyone who will listen that she gets up at 2:30 in the morning in order to get the housework done. She takes a shower, does the dishes, mops the floor and gets the bag ready for the preschooler. She goes back to bed for an hour or so then gets everybody ready to get out the door. She leaves for work around 7:15-7:30. (Her dh goes to work early in the morning and is home in time to get the kids from school.)

After her regular job, she also cleans houses some days. Then she doesn't get home until 7-7:30 at which time she is exhausted, takes a bath and goes to bed.

If this worked for her, it wouldn't be a problem, of course. But she is miserable and angry all the time. :oops: She complains about her dh all the time, how he won't take the 4yo to the park and doesn't clean up his messes around the house. He does take care of the animals and the kids from 2:30-9 BUT he may sneak in a nap while the kids watch tv. He cooks dinner every night and holds a good job.

She works so much because she wants for her kids what she never had - money and things. Money to have clothes and nice shoes, to go places and do things - do 4H, Boy Scouts, swimming, sports, going to pick apples, etc. She also like to have her hair colored and trimmed and her nails done.

She does make it a priority to be at her kids events whenever possible (ie when she's not working).

She's a very anxious kind of person, if that makes a difference.




MY take on this is that she is avoiding things by getting up so early and going to bed so early. She adores her kids so perhaps it is her dh she is avoiding. ?? Or do you see something else?


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: In this situation, what would you counsel a woman?
PostPosted: Mon Apr 30, 2018 12:10 pm 
Offline

Joined: Sat Jun 30, 2012 7:14 pm
Posts: 7702
My guess (having never met her and therefore not being in a very good position to guess) is that it is God she's avoiding. She's afraid to have two minutes alone with her own thoughts.

She "loves" her kids but spends almost no time with them?

I'm not sure you can "advise" her until she asks for help (any more than you can advise an alcoholic when she's drunk). But you can build a relationship with her, so that one day it might be you she thinks to ask. And you can be kind and "let your light shine" : )

_________________
http://stuffedveggies.blogspot.com/


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: In this situation, what would you counsel a woman?
PostPosted: Mon Apr 30, 2018 1:37 pm 
Offline

Joined: Sat Jun 30, 2012 5:22 pm
Posts: 8532
Anna1111 wrote:
My guess (having never met her and therefore not being in a very good position to guess) is that it is God she's avoiding. She's afraid to have two minutes alone with her own thoughts.

She "loves" her kids but spends almost no time with them?

I'm not sure you can "advise" her until she asks for help (any more than you can advise an alcoholic when she's drunk). But you can build a relationship with her, so that one day it might be you she thinks to ask. And you can be kind and "let your light shine" : )


I have been and i think the time may be approaching. She even came to church yesterday. Maybe it won't be me. Maybe the Lord can just speak to her heart and that is WAY ok by me! :mrgreen: I'm (almost) "afraid" that i would say the wrong thing. That's why i wanted to run it by here to see if i was way off base. Yes, i think you're right. I think it IS God she's avoiding! She's probably very aware of the wrong and complains about her dh to make her feel like HE is the problem. She needs to stop running. Even when she's on vacation she makes sure it's during times she'll be very busy like Christmas or the fair.

During the few moments she has before she gets up in the morning she often throws up because of anxiety. She feels like she may not make it! She stresses herself out like nobody's business. I think she's most relaxed when she's working but then she's always in a hurry to get things done! When everything's done she can relax and there's nothing more she can do until she gets off work. At home - well, you know there's ALWAYS something more to do!


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: In this situation, what would you counsel a woman?
PostPosted: Mon Apr 30, 2018 1:42 pm 
Offline

Joined: Sat Jun 30, 2012 7:14 pm
Posts: 7702
If *I* were to advise a *single* thing for such a person, it would be to observe the Lord's Day and on that day to rest & go to Church.

_________________
http://stuffedveggies.blogspot.com/


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: In this situation, what would you counsel a woman?
PostPosted: Sun May 06, 2018 11:45 am 
Offline

Joined: Sat Jun 30, 2012 5:22 pm
Posts: 8532
Anna1111 wrote:
If *I* were to advise a *single* thing for such a person, it would be to observe the Lord's Day and on that day to rest & go to Church.


We happened to be talking about her early bed time last week and she said she usually just lays there "trying" to go to sleep!!!!!!! So, :roll:

I don't know about "rest" - as she often works on sunday, but she said she'd see me at church today. :mrgreen:


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: In this situation, what would you counsel a woman?
PostPosted: Sun May 06, 2018 2:53 pm 
Offline

Joined: Sat Jun 30, 2012 7:14 pm
Posts: 7702
Baby steps, as they say. If she went to Church, that's wonderful! :D

_________________
http://stuffedveggies.blogspot.com/


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: In this situation, what would you counsel a woman?
PostPosted: Sun May 06, 2018 4:20 pm 
Offline

Joined: Sat Jun 30, 2012 5:22 pm
Posts: 8532
Anna1111 wrote:
Baby steps, as they say. If she went to Church, that's wonderful! :D


She didn't show up today. Actually, a LOT of people didn't show up today!


Top
 Profile  
 
Display posts from previous:  Sort by  
Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 7 posts ] 

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 4 guests


You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum

Search for:
Jump to:  
cron
Theme designed by stylerbb.net © 2008
Powered by phpBB © 2000, 2002, 2005, 2007 phpBB Group
All times are UTC - 5 hours [ DST ]