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 Post subject: My shocking discovery and new game plan
PostPosted: Sun Sep 28, 2014 1:21 pm 
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Location: Central TX
Ok, I know my last post about Christian's reading sounded positive, but unfortunately I think it was a false positive. He seems to make progress, but things just don't stick and remain consistent so that we can move forward, then it regresses. I have been ignoring my gut instincts for a couple years on this. I have been ignoring the red flags and warning signs and just hoping it would get better. But I just know this year is going to end like every other year, with us not really any further along than at the beginning of the year. Something is not right. I don't think I told you guys about the other problems he's having. One really big thing is reversing his b's and d's. Really bad. I know people say this can be normal even at his age still, but it's not just an occasional thing, it's constant. Another thing I've noticed is that he knows the phonogram sounds and rules, but doesn't apply them when he reads the words. If he messes up a word, I can ask what sound "ai" makes and he can tell me, but then he seems to forget when he reads it in a word. Things just don't stick. He also has what I recently found out is called Dysgraphia. He can write rather neatly and legibly if he's forced to, but it takes so much effort that writing three sentences leaves him exhausted, he doesn't space out his words, his spelling is still horrible. He knows "k and not c, with an i or an e", but he forgets when he's writing the words. Yesterday he spelt "notch" like "noch" and his second grade sister walked up, sighed and said "You have to have a consonant before the "ch", put a t". I know every kid is different, but there reaches a point where "different" is a problem and we have reached that point. This is stressing him out so much that he asks me every day if he has to do writing and the thought of having to do writing is excruciating for him. He even started having episodes of wetting the bed recently, something we have NEVER had a problem with. I think it is related to the stress that this puts on him.

SO, this all started when I suspected he might have ADD. I believe I have ADD that was undetected in school because I was not disruptive and I still did well because I could read, write, and take tests well. But I don't have a clue what any of the teachers ever said because I was always daydreaming. As an adult, I have the symptoms of adult ADD. So I am able to see these same things in him that I had when I was in school. I will read from a history book and he is in lala land. I will ask a question and he looks at me like a deer caught in the headlights. Even after repeating the material several times, he has a hard time giving me a real answer and his sister will shake her head and answer me. I do try to keep her occupied so that she's out of the room while I spend one-on-one time with him, but it takes so much time because of these things, that she finishes all her work and wanders into the room with us. Anyways, there are other things, such as impulsiveness and difficulty expressing himself and following directions, that I always just brushed aside as being a "quirk", but now I find out they are symptoms of ADD. I looked up natural ways to manage ADD and the #1 thing I found is to give a supplement of Omega 3 oil each day and many people notice an improvement in symptoms. Interestingly, a shortage of this fat is linked to other conditions, such as eczema (which he has) and allergies (which I have). So, I am going to try this and see if there is a difference. I am not at all interested in medicaiton, as I hear there can be bad side effects like stunted growth, depression, etc.

I also became aware of the connection between ADD/ADHD and Dyslexia, about 40% of people have both. I had never heard much about Dyslexia or looked into it. I either never looked up the symptoms or had blinders on, because I started researching Dyslexia and found that the symptoms describe him to a T. The poor reading, poor writing/spelling, reversals, skipping words, trouble finding words to express himself, etc. Every single website I check (and I've checked a lot), it's like someone wrote it about Christian. I read the story of a homeschooling mom that was strikingly similar to mine. She missed the warning signs for years until her son was in 4th grade, she had him tested and he was dyslexic. She realized he could not learn with traditional methods and switched to a homeschool program specifically for dyslexics. At 16, her son was reading novels like he had never had a problem. I was up literally all night last night (ok, I slept 2 hrs) researching and wrestling with this, before I finally came to terms with the fact that my son has ADD and Dyslexia, two labels I never thought in a million years that I would apply to him. But then it all just clicked and everything is explained now. I talked about it with my husband and I was afraid he would want to get him tested and do all these interventions and things we probably would never be able to afford anyways. I told him we have two choices, we can pay ridiculous money for testing that I already know the outcome of, or we can start right away with a curriculum for Dyslexia. I was also afraid he would think I had failed our son. But he was really supportive and he agreed with me that he didn't want him put on medications or anything and we are on the same page as far as the curriculum. It has good reviews and it does not teach site words or just memorizing/guessing. It gives mneumonics and pictures and takes a multisensory approach to help the phonograms stick in his mind and help him to be able to decode words. Dyslexic kids are very visual and I've noticed that Christian is VERY visual. This curriculum is inexpensive, too. You can't imagine the weight lifted off of my shoulders, to finally go with my gut and stop resisting something that will help him in the long run. There is also a writing program I am going to use to try to make writing a better experience for him, but the #1 best thing for kids with Dysgraphia is keyboarding, so I am about to have him start learning to type, which he is excited about and I think will be something fun for him.

Well, sorry this was so long. I am just ready to get this started right away, so things can start improving. I thought I would share all this for anyone else out there who is struggling and has kids with these "glitches" or thinks their kids may have these things. If anyone has more information on or experience with these things, please feel free to share. Also, if anyone thinks there is some real value in getting him tested and an official diagnosis. I just keep hearing that no real help is offered once you have an official diagnosis anyways, so I don't see the point. I hear they just give you a list of expensive places you can take them to, so I would rather do this myself at home since that's what homeschooling is all about. I realize this will not be an easy road and there is not a miracle cure that will make all things better, but I am encouraged by the many stories of dyslexic kids who learn to read and write and go on to college and a successful career. That is what I want for Christian. I honestly wonder all the time what type of future lies ahead of him, but now I feel hopeful. He's very smart, he just learns a completely different way than I've been teaching. I wish I had caught it earlier, but all I can do is move forward now and not dwell on the past.

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 Post subject: Re: My shocking discovery and new game plan
PostPosted: Sun Sep 28, 2014 9:16 pm 
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I'm praying for you, Lisa - I hope you're able to find what works to help Christian! (((Lisa)))

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 Post subject: Re: My shocking discovery and new game plan
PostPosted: Sat Oct 04, 2014 4:36 pm 
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Location: Central TX
Thank you, Anna.

It's been a rough week. It felt like everything kind of crashed around us, but I am feeling very positive now. I did some more research and we decided to change the curriculum we were going to buy and I'm very thankful we did. There is a lot of misinformation out there about Dyslexia and I had to sort through it to get to the truth. It turns out that research and experience shows that Dyslexia is an auditory processing issue. If anyone out there has a child with Dyslexia or suspects they have it, check out bartonreading.com. They have great videos and information on Dyslexia and they are very thorough with the help they provide. For example, we are planning on using their curriculum, but before you order it, they have a student screening test that you do. This is not a test for dyslexia, just to check a few weak areas they may have when it comes to phonemic awareness. I did this test with Christian and one part of the test is syllables. You just clap how many syllables are in each word. Sounds simple enough, but Christian failed it. I had already known he had trouble with this, but I never thought it had anything to do with his reading, I never connected it. So, they recommend I do some activities with him to strengthen this skill along with the reading/writing program. Another thing that is important for reading is being able to hear rhymes. That is another thing Christian has always had trouble with, picking out rhyming words. I never thought much of either of these things, but apparently they are a very important part of phonemic awareness and I believe that the lack of these skills is contributing to his trouble reading. This explains why phonics was not working on him, so I am so thankful to finally have answers. Phonics will not work on dyslexic kids because they are not ready for phonics. They lack phonemic awareness, they are not able to hear all the sounds in words. Sooooooo many things finally make sense to me now. So, we are on the right track by using the Barton reading system, which is based off the Orton-Gillingham method, the only method proven to work on Dyslexics and it has been used since the 1930's. It breaks everything down and teaches them phonemic awareness and then phonics in a multisensory way that makes so much sense. If your child has Dyslexia, don't take your chances with other curriculums/methods, get an Orton-Gillingham based one or hire a tutor that follows that method. There are a few other ones out there that are cheaper than the Barton one and they will work, but they are not put together as well as Barton and I know I will fall apart without the structure, guidance and training that this one provides, so this is just my personal choice and I'm thankful that my husband is as on board with this program as I am, since he's the one paying for it, lol. Just to have Christian finally reading as he should be, will be worth it all. And if this is as successful for us as it has been for everyone else (and I'm sure it will be), I am interested in becoming a tutor so I can help other kids with this.

I am also looking at ways to supplement our other school subjects with videos or other visuals, since as I said, Dyslexics are very visual. I had known he was very visual before (I used to have to tape pieces of paper over pictures so he would read the words and even now when he opens a book, he goes straight to the pictures and starts talking about them), but I didn't know just HOW important it was to him, it's vital to him making connections. So I really have to work a lot harder now to make school as multisensory as I can for him. Thankfully there are a ton of resources out there, most of them free or cheap. So I've just been going through everything, trying to find what I think will work for us.

So, I really see this as a positive thing that we finally have some answers about what has been going on with him since literally the first day of Kindergarten. I think I've mentioned before about how he had to be taken out of both his Kindergarten and 1st grade class for a special reading group and even then, he still was not able to read. And in 1st grade, his teacher complained that he would not do the writing assignments, which was literally just copying a couple sentences off the chalkboard. And he had some behavioral problems. And he failed every single spelling test, despite practicing for it all week. And he and he wrote his entire name backwards (something I had completely forgotten about until I went back and looked at some of his old school work). I now know that these are classic warning signs of Dyslexia. Some of these things could be normal childhood behavior, but the combination of all of them together and it standing out so much from all the other kids in class, was a huge warning sign. But no one ever mentioned dyslexia to me and even if they had, I probably would not have listened because I was convinced the school was his problem and things would get better after I took him out. But they didn't, so here we are. All we can do is move forward with this knowledge and all the available resources.

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Mom to Christian (13), Saphira (10), Xavier (5), and Adrian (2).


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 Post subject: Re: My shocking discovery and new game plan
PostPosted: Sat Oct 04, 2014 9:20 pm 
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Lisa,

So glad you are on the path to helping your son. Here are a couple articles for you:
http://www.theatlantic.com/health/archi ... en/380844/

http://www.homeschoolchristian.com/curr ... vision.php

Take a look over these. I think you will get more ideas!

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 Post subject: Re: My shocking discovery and new game plan
PostPosted: Sun Oct 05, 2014 10:54 am 
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I watched some of the demo video. I found it very interesting! I think everybody could probably gain some understanding of our crazy English using this! I didn't know that English words can't end in "i" unless they are either borrowed from another language or a shortened version of another word and I've been using English for nearly 60 years! I love the "closed in" idea for short vowels. I think this would help dh in HIS reading altho' I doubt he'd ever sit down and do the work at his age. ;-)

I'd love to hear how this works for you Lisa. :)


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 Post subject: Re: My shocking discovery and new game plan
PostPosted: Sun Oct 05, 2014 5:26 pm 
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I've heard good things about Orton-Gillingham, Lisa - I hope it really helps Christian! We have a girl with Down's Syndrome in Church who has learned to read with this method : )

Keeping you in my prayers here.

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 Post subject: Re: My shocking discovery and new game plan
PostPosted: Sun Oct 05, 2014 11:33 pm 
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Martha, thank you for those links. I will check them out.

Sis, that is exactly what dh and I thought, too. It makes so much sense, it should be taught this way to everyone. But it is a much more one-on-one approach and it is not needed for most students, so I can see why they don't. They want to take the "easy" route with lots of site words. I think I fell in love with it right away because it does exactly what I had been unsuccessfully trying to do with Christian. For example, you mentioned how English words can't end in "i". I have been explaining this to him for three years, that a "y" substitutes the "i" at the end of words and also that words ending with the long "E" sound, it's usually a "y". But no matter how much explaining I did, it never got through to him long term. He still insists on spelling "happy" as "happe" or sometimes even "hape". Sometimes he gets it right, but it's never consistent. I didn't know what to do to make these things stick in his mind until I realized he was dyslexic and that he had to be "shown" not "told", using a multisensory approach where he can literally pull apart and put together the words. I just love everything about this system and I haven't even started it yet, we are waiting for it to arrive. I know it will be a lot of work, but I'm confident we will finally have a break through. I will definitely update his progress.

This would probably also be something good for my dh, too, but he would never do it himself, lol. One of the other things I learned is that dyslexia is genetic, which is why there's usually more than one child in the family that has it. I realized that Christian probably got it from my dh. I mentioned it to him and he denied it at first because he did well in school and even went to college. I told him it was probably mild, but the fact that he does not like reading and only does it when he has to, won't read out loud, has horrible writing and spelling, etc. are all clues that he might have had it all along without ever realizing it. He started watching the videos with me and seeing the mistakes and struggles that Christian is having and said, "Maybe he did get it from me." Lol. This has been a big learning experience for all of us.

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 Post subject: Re: My shocking discovery and new game plan
PostPosted: Mon Oct 06, 2014 8:26 am 
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Eye exercises will significantly help dyslexia!

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 Post subject: Re: My shocking discovery and new game plan
PostPosted: Fri Oct 10, 2014 5:44 pm 
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Glad your are figureing out what is happening with Christian.
When dd was in first grade her teacher was telling she will not do this or that, but she would answer other kids questions before they got the chance to. She was trying to make her look dumb.
She said she does not read, well I knew she did, I had gotten the curriculum Teach your child to read in 100 easy lessons, we did it twice and I knew she knew how to read. One of the many reason I took her out of school and glad I did.

Will be praying for you.
Check out the book I mentioned it may help.


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 Post subject: Re: My shocking discovery and new game plan
PostPosted: Fri Oct 17, 2014 12:54 am 
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LindaS wrote:
Glad your are figureing out what is happening with Christian.
When dd was in first grade her teacher was telling she will not do this or that, but she would answer other kids questions before they got the chance to. She was trying to make her look dumb.
She said she does not read, well I knew she did, I had gotten the curriculum Teach your child to read in 100 easy lessons, we did it twice and I knew she knew how to read. One of the many reason I took her out of school and glad I did.

Will be praying for you.
Check out the book I mentioned it may help.


Thank you, I do have that book and used it for Saphira. It did get her off to a good start and she's now reading above grade level and constantly has her nose in a book. I have tried everything with Christian, I think I even tried that book, but that was all before I knew what the underlying problem was. I really think we're on the right track now. He's about to start level two of the Barton program and it is going well so far.

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