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 Post subject: My parents are coming for a 'visit'.
PostPosted: Mon Sep 10, 2012 9:54 am 
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Joined: Sun Jul 01, 2012 5:16 pm
Posts: 2296
Location: Sunshine State
We moved them from TX to So.FL last summer to be closer to extended family, visited with them for Christmas, now my parents will be flying back the end of the month...this may be a permanent thing. My dad is having a hard time dealing with my mom, dont know if its just her reluctance on leaving the house or mild dementia or her health. We will see. She absolutely refuses any outside help to cook, clean, etc. so he's been helping (always has). He misses his greeter-job at Walmart and his gardening. Family in So.FL have their own lives so they havent seen much of them anyway. Our home is big enough to subdivide, they can have the large master bedroom and master bath (which has a walk-in shower for my mom) we can live in the other side of the house that has 2 large bedrooms and a smaller bedroom and the den plus the hall bath. Big plus, he has 4 acres to tinker with. We offered this to them before they made the drastic move to FL, but mom was set to go. I think he has stopped doing what SHE WANTS and is starting to do what SHE NEEDS. (So glad we put in the wheelchair ramp last year.)

So we will see what this new adventure will bring.

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 Post subject: Re: My parents are coming for a 'visit'.
PostPosted: Mon Sep 10, 2012 10:01 am 
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Joined: Sat Jun 30, 2012 7:14 pm
Posts: 8078
God Bless - will be praying for you.

If there's been a change in how they get along, I give it a 98% chance of being either dementia or TIA's (which have pretty much the same effect as dementia). Your Dad is very wise to do what she needs instead of what she wants - much like we do with small children.

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 Post subject: Re: My parents are coming for a 'visit'.
PostPosted: Mon Sep 10, 2012 1:11 pm 
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Joined: Sat Jun 30, 2012 2:58 pm
Posts: 1095
Now that they have had the taste of Florida and what it did/did not really have to offer, they can make the move back, and appreciate the benefits of what you have to offer. Hopefully your Mom can find contentment. Sounds like your Dad will have much joyful opportunities there.


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 Post subject: Re: My parents are coming for a 'visit'.
PostPosted: Mon Sep 10, 2012 2:35 pm 
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Joined: Sat Jun 30, 2012 6:58 pm
Posts: 5828
I agree with what everyone else said! Also, you will also feel better knowing how they are first hand.


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 Post subject: Re: My parents are coming for a 'visit'.
PostPosted: Fri Sep 14, 2012 8:10 pm 
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Joined: Wed Jul 04, 2012 5:54 pm
Posts: 664
Sounds like God is putting the whole plan together and your dad is in agreement.
Praying your mom will settle and be peaceful with the idea.

Know I'll be praying for you and your family as you make the transition.
Question? Is there a Wal-mart nearby that would employ your Dad? Sounds like he really enjoyed working there!

And I agree with Anna. I'll bet your mom's situation is stemming from some dimentia. She sounds like my mom in how she responds to the offer for "help".


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 Post subject: Re: My parents are coming for a 'visit'.
PostPosted: Fri Sep 14, 2012 11:47 pm 
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Joined: Sat Jun 30, 2012 11:01 pm
Posts: 2491
Briva wrote:
We moved them from TX to So.FL last summer to be closer to extended family, visited with them for Christmas, now my parents will be flying back the end of the month...this may be a permanent thing. My dad is having a hard time dealing with my mom, dont know if its just her reluctance on leaving the house or mild dementia or her health. We will see. She absolutely refuses any outside help to cook, clean, etc. so he's been helping (always has). He misses his greeter-job at Walmart and his gardening. Family in So.FL have their own lives so they havent seen much of them anyway. Our home is big enough to subdivide, they can have the large master bedroom and master bath (which has a walk-in shower for my mom) we can live in the other side of the house that has 2 large bedrooms and a smaller bedroom and the den plus the hall bath. Big plus, he has 4 acres to tinker with. We offered this to them before they made the drastic move to FL, but mom was set to go. I think he has stopped doing what SHE WANTS and is starting to do what SHE NEEDS. (So glad we put in the wheelchair ramp last year.)

So we will see what this new adventure will bring.


Praying.

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Not your last resort.


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 Post subject: Re: My parents are coming for a 'visit'.
PostPosted: Sat Sep 15, 2012 5:48 pm 
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Joined: Sat Jun 30, 2012 5:19 pm
Posts: 4143
Location: NE Central Texas
Praying they will agree to come to Texas. Keep that house cool for them in the summer time.
My mother would not live with either of us so she went to a nursing home and died there. Wish she would of come over here.

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