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 Post subject: Do you say anything?
PostPosted: Fri Oct 12, 2018 11:39 pm 
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Hmmmm. There is a Christian man that comes into the bank where i work. He's never given me the time of day and avoids my window if possible. Today i waited on him. No problem. But later, as i'm reading my co-worker's fb post i see he posted "had to deal with the substitute at the bank today".

ouch! :?

I don't know whether i should put a sad face on the post, ignore the whole thing, or be flippant like "careful there Jimmy!". ???? He's an older man (older than ME) and i just don't expect that kind of attitude, ya know? Sure, i may be slower and less knowledgeable than the other 2 women at the bank but good grief! sigh

What do you think?


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 Post subject: Re: Do you say anything?
PostPosted: Sat Oct 13, 2018 9:28 am 
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If it wasn't addressed to me, and he probably didn't intend me to see it, I'd probably try to pretend I hadn't. He's probably afraid of the possibility of a mistake with his money rather than disliking you as a person. In future, I'd be friendly with him, and if he "has to" be in your line (which is to say, you're the next teller when he gets to the front, but other tellers are working) chat with him kindly and ask him if he'd like to wait a couple of more minutes to have one of the tellers he has a personal rapport with. Give him a way to save face and have the teller he wants, if that is possible.

In customer service, lots of customers have their "favorites" (like a favorite waitress at a restaurant) - it doesn't mean they hate the others, just that they prefer someone else.

Granted, his fb comment was not very considerate, but he didn't name you by name, and probably didn't think about people thinking of you, personally. People feel anonymous on the internet - and in their cars (where no one can see them doing personal grooming at stoplights ; )

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 Post subject: Re: Do you say anything?
PostPosted: Sat Oct 13, 2018 11:29 am 
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Anna1111 wrote:
If it wasn't addressed to me, and he probably didn't intend me to see it, I'd probably try to pretend I hadn't. He's probably afraid of the possibility of a mistake with his money rather than disliking you as a person. In future, I'd be friendly with him, and if he "has to" be in your line (which is to say, you're the next teller when he gets to the front, but other tellers are working) chat with him kindly and ask him if he'd like to wait a couple of more minutes to have one of the tellers he has a personal rapport with. Give him a way to save face and have the teller he wants, if that is possible.

In customer service, lots of customers have their "favorites" (like a favorite waitress at a restaurant) - it doesn't mean they hate the others, just that they prefer someone else.

Granted, his fb comment was not very considerate, but he didn't name you by name, and probably didn't think about people thinking of you, personally. People feel anonymous on the internet - and in their cars (where no one can see them doing personal grooming at stoplights ; )


While what you say is true in general, in a town of 800 with only 1 bank that has 3 tellers of which ONE is "the substitute", it may not hold. ;) I actually don't care that people have their favorites. I used to do that at the grocery store, LOL. No offense to others.

I had 3 people come in yesterday that ALWAYS go to the other teller. (And they are ALL church members - which i think irks me the most.) There are obvious people i cannot help - people that are dealing with CD's or large money amounts. Regulars that know the "real" tellers need to help them but at least chit chat while they're waiting - that's fine. These 3 yesterday had no choice as the other teller was opening accounts. :mrgreen: I stamped the wrong end of the check for one of them and she mentioned it quicker than i could flip the check. It's not a biggie but she's one of those very precise kind of people. sigh I don't care if they'd rather go to the other teller as long as they're nice about it.

Rambling. My tho't is that he should be "brought up short" and reminded that others ARE reading on fb. Brought up short is harsher than what i mean but do you see what i'm saying? It almost seems deceitful NOT to make an acknowledgement. ?? And it might create a dialogue when he comes in next. ??


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 Post subject: Re: Do you say anything?
PostPosted: Sat Oct 13, 2018 2:15 pm 
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I spent enuf time in Asia, that I think first of "saving face" and preventing the possibility of embarrassing someone else (that's also in our Church prayers : )

There are two Bible Verses that come right away: Love covers a multitude of sins.

And "If your Brother offends you, go to him . . . . (of course, as you know - this is a one-to-one thing, not a fb thing )

But, of course, these verses present rather opposite perspectives - so you have to decide how big the offense is *to you* - if it really needs discussing, go to him & talk to him one to one. But, try not to embarrass him unduly :)

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 Post subject: Re: Do you say anything?
PostPosted: Sat Oct 13, 2018 4:07 pm 
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Anna1111 wrote:
I spent enuf time in Asia, that I think first of "saving face" and preventing the possibility of embarrassing someone else (that's also in our Church prayers : )

There are two Bible Verses that come right away: Love covers a multitude of sins.

And "If your Brother offends you, go to him . . . . (of course, as you know - this is a one-to-one thing, not a fb thing )

But, of course, these verses present rather opposite perspectives - so you have to decide how big the offense is *to you* - if it really needs discussing, go to him & talk to him one to one. But, try not to embarrass him unduly :)


Ok, fine! :P I'll have to take your word for it. That's why i asked! LOL I can't trust my own feelings in this situation. I could be doing a "passive aggressive" thing. I can let it blow over unless the opportunity arises when he comes in.

Thanks, Anna.


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