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 Post subject: New to the Forum-NEED PRAYER
PostPosted: Sun Sep 02, 2012 11:36 pm 
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Joined: Sun Sep 02, 2012 11:11 pm
Posts: 3
Hi Everyone,
I'm new to this forum, actually to any forum. I have never even posted or been a member of any kind of group. But tonight I find myself desperate for fellowship among hs families. I have always hsed my children ages 17, 14, and 4. With the older two I enjoyed it, felt that it was all in God's plan. But all the sudden this past year and going into this year I'm very burdened and troubled about teaching. I feel as I've lost my desire and motivation to hs. I've became really depressed and find it hard to even begin our day. I know the most obvious choice seems to be to don't do it anymore, but its not that simple. My son(14yr old) has a learning disability and requires one on one attention. Public school is out of the question, and private in our area are not equipped. So here I am ladies desperate for some encouragement and advice on how to put some life back into our schooling.

Thanks, Denise


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 Post subject: Re: New to the Forum-NEED PRAYER
PostPosted: Mon Sep 03, 2012 12:26 am 
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Joined: Sat Jun 30, 2012 6:58 pm
Posts: 5828
Try not to get discouraged. We all go through times of burnout. It sounds like you just need to take some time to do "school" differently or not at all for a short break in the routine.
Take a day off, pack a picnic lunch, and get out of the house! :)
Where you go will be up to you... the beach, a park, a walk downtown, etc.
Shake things up a bit.


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 Post subject: Re: New to the Forum-NEED PRAYER
PostPosted: Mon Sep 03, 2012 12:44 am 
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Joined: Mon Jul 02, 2012 11:16 am
Posts: 633
Location: The Beautiful Blue Ridge Mountains, VA
Good advice Tory.

And Denise we will be praying for you to be refreshed, renewed and strengthened!

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“The hunger for love is much more difficult to remove than the hunger for bread.”
― Mother Teresa


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 Post subject: Re: New to the Forum-NEED PRAYER
PostPosted: Mon Sep 03, 2012 1:04 am 
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Joined: Sat Jun 30, 2012 2:58 pm
Posts: 1095
Welcome to the group Denise! So sorry you are in such a tough spot right now. You will have many prayer warriors lifting you up now.

Why don't you tell us a bit about your ds (dear son) and his special needs. Perhaps we can give you some ideas on how to create a new approach to his learning this year. How have you approached his schooling in the past (and how you approached it with your other children. This will give us an idea of what you have done, what seemed to work well, what didn't...

There are as many different approaches to providing a learning environment for your child/for your family here as there are members of the group. We all do things uniquely to best fit our family's needs, so you will get a lot of different ideas. The one thing we have in common for sure is that we are here to support each other, no matter how we do things.

Hang in there. Take a deep breath. Give yourself permission to just relax and do nothing right now. Your son will continue to learn every day, whether you do something structured or not. He will be okay, and so will you. We are here to assist you as you need.


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 Post subject: Re: New to the Forum-NEED PRAYER
PostPosted: Mon Sep 03, 2012 9:57 am 
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Joined: Sat Jun 30, 2012 7:14 pm
Posts: 8115
Will pray Denise.

Welcome : )

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 Post subject: Re: New to the Forum-NEED PRAYER
PostPosted: Mon Sep 03, 2012 10:44 am 
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Joined: Sun Jul 01, 2012 9:48 am
Posts: 1026
Location: Middle GA
I SO understand. I have felt that way many, many times in my 15+ homeschooling *career*!!
I can't offer any good advice right now - but I can offer prayers and (((HUGS)))!

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I can do ALL things through Christ, who strengthens me. (Phil. 4:13)


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 Post subject: Re: New to the Forum-NEED PRAYER
PostPosted: Mon Sep 03, 2012 12:36 pm 
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Joined: Sun Sep 02, 2012 11:11 pm
Posts: 3
Thanks everyone for the good advice and prayers. My ds was diagnosed with severe OCD and sensory integration. We have used all different kinds of curriculm. We have used Switched on Schoolhouse, Abeka (books and dvds), Saxon Math, and Lifepacs to name a few. When they were little we did unit studies about things that interested them. Nate (ds) really doesn't care what we use but does like to have something set in place. He really likes to look at a book or chapter and see he completed it. He is really hung up on grade level and wants to be in the right level (because of friends) which at this point would be about a 8-9th grade level. We are doing 6th grade level and he still struggles. He was diagnosed with OCD and sensory issues and clearly has those problems. But he has many if not all symptoms of Aspergers. We haven't take him back to look into this more because he thinks there is nothing wrong with him, and I think the label from Doctors would just hurt more than help. I know as a mom that spends everyday with him, that if looked into further that that would be the diagnosis.

My oldest is very independent and will be done with school this year. My little one is eager and able to learn quickly and I haven't saw any problems there. Nate is able to do some work alone. He wasn't able to perform in public school because of not being able to keep up. He also tried to get every little thing right and in order to suit himself and was often just left out. He gets confused easily as far as directions both written and verbal. He would get lost at school because of all the confusion. With sensory issues he sometimes doesn't even hear certain things, like when the bell rang at the end of the day to dismiss school, he never heard it and was left in the building alone until I went in looking for him. He also takes EVERYTHING to heart, he doesn't understand humor. If someone said or did something and lets face it, that was daily in public school, like picking on him or something that most kids could get over he can't. It would bother him so much he would throw up, not sleep, and dwell on it continuously, to the point it would consume his every thought. So I know that I have to teach him here at home, but I'm really having a hard time this year. Its not at all his fault, he is eager to learn and very well-behaved. I think maybe its a combination of both being in the house too much(me) he is involved in alot of things, and no one understands.(except dh he is great support) Everyone is constantly saying send them to public school, lots of kids have problems, he will be fine. But they have no idea what it does to him mentally, emotionally, and physically. I feel guilty just for feeling this way. I know he needs me, along with everyone else, but I really would like to have just two seconds to myself. Even when I have the opportunity to go do something or be alone, I spend every second of that time reading up on hs stuff and how to better teach. I feel like we have been spinning our wheels for the last few years. I'm constantly wondering if someone else is better equipped to teach him. I haven't bought any kits this year because I really don't know what to buy. I bought him a big book of everything and he has been working out of it.

Well that is a little about us. Any advice or suggestions would be greatly appreciated.


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 Post subject: Re: New to the Forum-NEED PRAYER
PostPosted: Mon Sep 03, 2012 1:31 pm 
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Joined: Sat Jun 30, 2012 7:14 pm
Posts: 8115
Well - a few thoughts - take them if they're helpful, leave them if they're not:

I only have a tiny bit of experience with Aspergers, I have a young friend with it whom I have seen grown from 12 to 18, and is now thriving in a college environment.

From what you're saying, and from what I know of my young friend who has Aspergers, I might suggest getting educational videos for him. My friend thrives on Animal planet - has memorized everything there is to know about animals. A good series like American experience (from the library, or online on PBS website), might give your son something very educational to focus on and give you and your other dc the time you need to get some things done.

Also, doing the free 20 questions on IXL each day might be something he enjoys. It gives one that opportunity to fill in every blank perfectly, and learn something, too.

If your son thrives on workbooks (which he could, with the OCD), and if it matches your religious views and budget, ACE curriculum might be a good fit.

A few things he could work on independently might give him a chance to excel, and give you and your other dc some much needed time to focus on other things.

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 Post subject: Re: New to the Forum-NEED PRAYER
PostPosted: Mon Sep 03, 2012 3:02 pm 
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Joined: Sat Jun 30, 2012 2:58 pm
Posts: 1095
My bonus son (my nephew) moved in with us when he was 11, but he was emotionall, socially probably 5 or 6. I suspected Asperger's but we did not have him tested until he was 18 and wanting to become a client of Vocational Rehabilitation to assist him with some job skills. He definitely has Asperger's. :) It is really a blessing in many ways, especially once they can have some social/facial/body language recognition/skills figured out. We worked on this for a few years, but he now "gets" people most of the time.

Since your son is wanting to be at grade level with his friends and they are 9th grade, perhaps you could get a GED book and have your son start working through it. It is considered a 10th grade level test. He could slowly work his way through the book over the next few years and know that he is where they will be soon, and he can be "catching" up or working "ahead" of that level, if he wants to think in those terms.

My nephew had wanted to do an online college program while in high school and it required a GED or a diploma. Since he had not graduated, he opted to start studying for his GED. He did a more rigorous schedule with it than you son would need to, as he was on a limited time frame. We went through the book, broke it down into how many pages per day/per week/per month to meet his time frame. Initially it was much more than he wanted to do, but he had a goal and he changed his attitude about it and accomplished his goal. He took the test, passed and then decided he was not ready to be focused enough with an online program, so he kept up with his other studies and earned a diploma the next year.

Perhaps this would be a way he can have the structure he wants/needs, time to accomplish things as he better learns a skill in the book, and be working at a similar level to his friends. He can use other resources to help explain things if he gets stuck in the GED book.

By the way, my nephew is now 22, living independently, works full time and enjoying life in the way that fits his personality and interests. He may decide one day to further his structured education, or he may not. He may just continue as we all do, learning new things as we go through adulthood. :)


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 Post subject: Re: New to the Forum-NEED PRAYER
PostPosted: Wed Sep 05, 2012 10:12 am 
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Joined: Sun Jul 01, 2012 5:16 pm
Posts: 2311
Location: Sunshine State
Welcome aboard Denise. I dont have any personal experience with aspergers but have several friends with autistic/aspergers children. All but one are thriving. What I see is heavy 'dad' involvement. One kid I have know since he was a precocious 18mth old, he is a senior this year. He has thrived on electronic toys such as http://www.knex.com/ woodworking, chemistry kits, cooking, robotics, astronomy club (telescopes), computer languages. He is always building something or working on some project, he will be an Eagle Scout soon.

So maybe integrate reading-writing-mathematics within those 'fun' learning experiences for awhile, get him to learn a trade (carpentry, masonry, plumbing, auto repair) the freedom of homeschooling is the adventure of being able to try these things. Both our older kids know how to change their own oil in their cars and replace their brakes, our son and daughter. Daughter is also handy with a jigsaw.

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"...with men this is impossible, but with God all things are possible." Matthew 19:26


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