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 Post subject: Update on my father and mother
PostPosted: Mon Jul 16, 2012 9:42 pm 
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My dad appears to be in the final stages of Alzheimers.
From what the GP has stated this weekend, there is more than likely nothing we can do for him, except take good care of him. He is currently in a wheelchair and no longer able to walk as of this past week. We thought he was having back issues, but it is probably more deed ceded than that.

Mom's kidney's are working @ 18% and when she gets to 14%, she will need kidney dialysis, but she has refused to sign a living will. She did sign a DNR when we were with hospice 1 1/2 years ago, but the hospital kept it, and it is no longer accessible, so I'm trying to figure out a way to obtain a living will document for her. She is SO stubborn and difficult to work with on these things. I am hoping she will not request kidney dialysis.

Everything is prepared for their funerals, for the most part. It would be interesting, just as the courts are wanting me to transfer them to a state run facility that would GROSSLY be against all that I stand for, if both my parent's were heavenbound...ALL these matters are in God's hands and I must trust Him for the outcome right now. Thank you SO very much for your prayers.


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 Post subject: Re: Update on my father and mother
PostPosted: Mon Jul 16, 2012 10:19 pm 
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((Cindy))) I am praying. I can't imagine having both parents going through this at once.
You are a good dd.


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 Post subject: Re: Update on my father and mother
PostPosted: Mon Jul 16, 2012 10:47 pm 
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Praying here, too.

I don't know the specifics of your situation with both parents (I was very happy to have dialysis for my Mom, in our situation), but praying for God to watch over them & you & protect you all in this difficult time.

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 Post subject: Re: Update on my father and mother
PostPosted: Mon Jul 16, 2012 11:36 pm 
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I don't know what will wind up happening in mom's situation, to be quite honest.
She keeps refusing to tell the dr. what she wants and refuses to have me help her.
I am trying to contact her former parish nurse, to see if mom will let her help her fill out a living will.

I don't like playing God with my parent's life. That puts me in a VERY uncomfortable position. I know what my children need to take care of my hubby and I when the time comes, and I will make sure they have it to avoid situations like this.


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 Post subject: Re: Update on my father and mother
PostPosted: Tue Jul 17, 2012 9:51 am 
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Her refusal to make a decision or ask for help sounds like it may be that the kidney problem is causing confusion - that can happen. Or she may have some degree of dementia herself. (The docs never caught my Mom's until an MRA 3 weeks before she passed away).

If either of those is the case, she may not be able to truly express herself in a living will.

Joni Erickson Tada wrote an excellent book (sorry about the blunt title) that really helped me when I had to make these sorts of decisions for my Mom, and help with them for my sister (her kids had JUST reached legal adulthood). http://www.amazon.com/When-Right-Joni-E ... ie%2C+tada

Perhaps you will find it helpful too.

Be praying for you in this difficult time.

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 Post subject: Re: Update on my father and mother
PostPosted: Tue Jul 17, 2012 10:26 am 
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Anna, mom has had dimentia/mental health issues ever since I can remember. It just was never diagnosed. I am not sure what the courts will recognize right now. I am her legal guardian, and am hoping my judgement can over-ride hers right now, as she clearly isn't capable of signing something like this and being in "sound mind" while doing so. I have a call into my attorney to define the parameters of my guardianship status and to clarify what it covers should I need to make a decision regarding mom's living will information.

I think she is afraid of dying, despite her faith in the Lord. Somehow, she feels she won't "need" to make a decision.

Oh and thank you for the title of Joni's book. I will check it out.


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 Post subject: Re: Update on my father and mother
PostPosted: Tue Jul 17, 2012 10:30 am 
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May God Bless you & give you wisdom, love & peace in making these decisions. We'll be praying for you here.

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 Post subject: Re: Update on my father and mother
PostPosted: Tue Jul 17, 2012 11:59 am 
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Tory wrote:
((Cindy))) I am praying. I can't imagine having both parents going through this at once.
You are a good dd.


Amen.

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 Post subject: Re: Update on my father and mother
PostPosted: Thu Jul 19, 2012 7:21 am 
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Praying that the Lord will have mercy upon this entire situation and that you will be blessed by His will.

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