I dealt with this myself and it didn't get any better until a few things happened. They're all connected in a line of action, one coming right after the other:
1. When at my doctor's office to discuss my hysterectomy, doc agreed with the OB/GYN but also said that until I dealt with my past, I would continue to see physical effects. He suggested I write. So I began with my earliest memory which was at about 3 1/2 yo. I wrote what I could remember until I came to about 5yo. That was a huge bump and came with a ton of tears but it was amazingly cleansing.
2. I ran two marathons. I have always dealt with fear of failure so I chose a goal (unbeknownst to me) and during the process of working up to the 26.2 miles, I learned a lot about myself and what I can overcome. It was more of a spiritual battle than anything else.
3. I started forgiving people. I even went so far as to contact my former step-father who I felt abandoned me while he was still married to my mother. He and I finally talked and the story of forgiveness was truly a miracle. I believe I might've written about it here at HSC. That started the ball rolling. I contacted a few others to ASK for forgiveness, rather than expecting an apology. The floodgates opened!
4. I found the Orthodox Church. I know many of you don't agree. However, what I found was not just a building to worship in or an authority to obey. What I found was the continuation of healing. It is said that the Church is a hospital for the soul and I have definitely found that to be true. I had many people in my family or in my Protestant churches who would say, "Just decide to get over it," but truly I believe that is not how we find victory. We should be there for eachother and carry eachother's burdens. I have never once heard a platitude in the EOC and that's all I heard in Protestantism. (I'm certain not all P churches are like this; it was my personal experience though and did nothing for my spiritual growth). I am now able to work these things out one by one as the Holy Spirit leads and I know that each day, God will shed more light in the dark areas, the painful areas, and allow me to overcome. And I am able to do this because of the long tradition/Tradition of the Church.